‘Annoyingly Happy Couples Go House Shopping’ – Scene 1 – Take 1: And action! – ‘It’s not Stars Hollow!’ – And cut! 37 minutes at the traffic-cones obstacle course! And the award for ‘World’s Gayest Party-Designer’ goes to… Randall Farber! Kirk – Destroying children’s dreams since 1972! ‘Hohoho!’ Nobody likes lawyers! E-Vite to ‘Party Planning Hell’ – RSVP or jump of a building! Fancy people spit! Lying for Capt. Crunch! Lorelai, Luke & a pick-pocketing baby – How it should have been! Rory ‘High Stakes Deception’ Gilmore & Logan ‘Imaginary Boyfriend’ Huntzberger are related… ew! Meat loaf – ‘Most Disgusting Food 2006’ Buying the internet for 7$! Weird, awkward, juvenile – All that Yale can afford! Who is French-Fry-Guy? Rory is beautiful – That’s no secret! ‘Let’s make a baby.’ – ‘WHAT?!’ 12-year-olds don’t scare Kirk! No dancing but wedding vows! No one cares about what you’re thinking, Chris! Being pregnant – The most horrible thing in the world! And the battle for partial custody begins! Everyone has a crush on Rory! Marty is being a jerk again – But only until the trust-fund kicks in! Logan – It’s all about truthiness! Trouble in paradise! 143! ‘Boys suck!’ What’s your definition of ‘better’? ‘Venus and a bowl of soup!’ Christopher ‘The Gangster Of Love’ Hayden Vs Luke ‘That Diner-Guy’ Danes – Let’s get ready to rumble! Fistfight in Christmas-Wonderland – Let’s call it a draw! Friendless-Rory is cute when sobbing! (Un)friendly advice about marriage: ‘A ring is no guarantee.’

And in the next episode of ‘Gilmore Girls’ we’ll find out what Santa is keeping in his bag!

– Michael –

Misses Tip O’Neil, happy couples and awful presents: Wolfgirl by Kiki Smith – Payback Richard-&-Emily-Style! ‘And what was it exactly that she said?’ – ‘… we just ended up… ehm… getting married. So, anyway…’ – A nice memory on an answering machine! Lor & Chris – Something to be ashamed of? Free cocktails – Let’s swing! Cat-Sweater-Contracts & Kick-In-Rockefeller-Party-Rejections! Giant Pencil is back! Knit-A-Thon – I knit, so I am! Anything carbonated – Hit me! Babies – Free home delivery! ‘Just because it’s decorative doesn’t mean it’s not sharp!’ Futuristic Pirates – ARG! Babette & Miss Patty – Meet the rude side of Stars Hallow! Welcome wagon… ehm… wow, fantastic white coat! Marty – ‘Falling For You’! Double-sided Tape and Uggs – So 2002! New Mexico – A desert far far away! Non-Theme-y spaghetti and anything nautical! Regular guys drink beer! Weird-Dorky-Loser-Girl is upset! Paris is not laughing – Now THAT’s a shocker! Paris & Doyle hip-hop-dancing – A sight to remember! Men-Date-Fashion-Disaster! I repeat: MEN-DATE! Knit Or Go Home! You don’t joke about farming! It’s all about commitment! You suck as a mum! It’s show time! 6-5-4-3-2-1 – ‘Go ahead and knit!’ Let’s party like it’s 2002! First legal drink – Upside-Down-Tequila-Slammer with a twist! ‘Go Paris!’ Cute baby – Let’s leave TJ and Liz unmentioned! Thank you, Christopher! (sarcasm kills) Lucy – 21 years, 11 lbs and 90% tequila! Memories of Naked-Marty-Schwarzenegger! And he has officially stopped being a jerk! Don’t you just love Uncomfortable-Rory in her short skirt? Christopher isn’t the smartest guy or the toughest guy! But he is committed to Lorelai! Luke is April’s father… and he has rights!

Don’t forget to place your bets on next week’s fight: Luke ‘7.02-all-over-again’ Danes Vs Christopher ‘I’m-the-one-with-the-ring’ Hayden – A fight for love, honour and the mere fun of it!

– Michael –